Day 110 - Scattered and Reflective Thoughts

Today I have scattered but reflective and introspective thoughts scrambling around in my mind.

Last night, my whole family attended Wednesday night church service together. Since there was a meal prepared by the church, we went early and ate and fellowshipped with other church members. There was a wonderful meal cooked: grilled chicken, mashed potatoes, salad, green beans, and even delicious and moist brownies for dessert.

Quite a few people were there, along with two busloads of children from throughout our town and neighborhing towns. Apparently, this church busses in children from all over: lower income trailer parks, lower income housing projects, and lower income homes. And boy, did these children show it! The smaller children wore ragged clothing and ragged shoes. Some came with coats and hats...most did not. There were even about 12 teenagers who came on those buses, too. The type of teenager that has nose studs, tongue studs, belly button piercings, low cut clothing, FLIP-FLOPS, and lots and lots of eye makeup on the girls. The boys wore baggy, saggy pants, hooded sweatshirts, and worn out tennis shoes without laces.

My youngest daughter, the toddler, went to the nursery with just two other toddlers. She enjoyed herself in that large room full of organized toys. The nursery worker was a clean-cut teenage girl with great manners.

My middle daughter ran down the hall excitedly with her appropriate AWANA class and teacher. She ended up having a fabulous time in her AWANA class, memorizing scripture and playing games with other children her age. She was completely oblivious to the financial/economic line of demarcation between herself and the other children in her class. Praise God for that!

But my eldest daughter struggled through her youth group meeting. She was hesitant to even go into the room. The youth pastor looked no older than 25 himself, wore baggy jeans and a gray, hooded sweatshirt. Kind of rough-looking himself. I peeked into the room when I dropped her off at her class and I was shocked at the type of youth in this room. Just as I explained above. Rough kids, for sure, from very rough backgrounds. Something my eldest has not been exposed to and something I've been away from since I left my home at the age of 21 and moved out West with my husband.

During the AWANA time, my husband and I snuggled up next to each other in the church pews while the pastor spoke of God's grace...and eventual judgment on everyone. He followed the ancient Israelites' lives, going back as far as Noah and others...up through Ruth and Rahab and even King David. And then tied it all in with the New Testament believers/apostles...and us, as individuals. Very good sermon.

While I was sitting in this warm church with dimly lit lights, and while I was snuggled up against my husband's warm chest, I kept feeling like this was so surreal...somebody pinch me! There was my husband with Bible open on his lap, he's taking notes and listening intently, even shedding a tear or two during prayer time. I still shake my head in disbelief at his drastic life change. But Praising God at the same time!

At the end of the church service and while driving home, my eldest said in the car, "I'm never going there again. Those kids were awful! They didn't listen, they weren't dressed appropriately, they didn't speak appropriately." And then my daughter said one of the girls' prayer of thankfulness was that it didn't hurt when she got her belly button pierced last week.

Truly, my daughters are sheltered children. They don't see poverty from our neighborhood. They don't hang with lower-income children who have alcoholic fathers, or refrigerators that are bare, or kids who get all of their clothing from Good Will or donations from charity. These children don't even have the basic manners that my children were taught as toddlers.

My daughter didn't like it one bit.

I tried to explain that these are exactly the people Jesus came for! These are His lost children, and we are called to be salt of the earth and lights in this dark world!

But she's only 15. She wants to belong to a group of children more like herself, from her financial strata, from her well-mannered group of friends; children who wear designer blue jeans and expensive Ugg boots. She's uncomfortable and shaken.

But I know God has a plan in this. I pray that my eldest daughter would learn to be salt of the earth and a light unto the darkest places. I pray that she would see these children as Jesus does: not as poor, impoverished and poorly-mannered and poorly-dressed ragamuffins, but as wounded and hurting children that desperately need to know Jesus and His love.

Matthew 5:13: "You are the salt of the earth."

Proverbs 13:9: "The light of the righteous shines brightly."