Day 73 - Not My Will But Thy Will

When I was a child, I'd often see the local Amish farmers training their new horses. The farmer would put blinders on the young horse, along with a bit and bridle, and spend hour after hour training the horse to obey his commands.

At first, the young horse bucks and pulls away, not wanting to submit to the authority of the farmer.

But after much hard work, the farmer has tamed the horse into submitting to the gentle tugs of the bridle. Tug left and the horse turns left. Tug right and the horse turns right. The blinders are so important because, as you all know, the Amish pile in their wife and children into tiny little buggies attached to the horse...and drive down main roads with cars honking and semi-trucks grinding past. The horse cannot for one moment be frightened at what lies to either side of him...but must look forward only and press on toward the goal...with only the gentle tugs of the farmer's reigns to guide him.

Much is the same with my life, I am beginning to understand.

My Lord has to train me to follow His direction, to go where He is leading me. At first, I am like that young horse, bucking and tugging against the Lord's will. At first, I am a bit frightened to submit my will to His.

But life is like that highway full of cars and semi-tractor trailers speeding by me. It's like my husband and my precious children are all riding in a small, fragile buggie as I am being led by the Lord.

I cannot be afraid. I must obey His guidance. I must TRUST that the Lord knows how to lead me (and my brood)...despite the pitfalls that surround me.

Matthew 6:9-13: The Lord's Prayer.

"Our Father, Who Art in Heaven,

Hallowed Be Thy Name.

Thy Kingdom Come, Thy Will Be Done,

On Earth as it is in Heaven.

Give Us This Day our Daily Bread,

And Forgive us our Sins As We Forgive Those Who Have Sinned Against Us.

Lead Us Not Into Temptation But Deliver Us From Evil One.

For Thine is the Kingdom and the Power and the Glory...Forever and Ever! Amen."

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"Trust in the Lord with all your heart...lean not on your own understanding...in all your ways acknowledge Him...and He will make direct your path!" Proverbs 3:5-6

Father, I pray today for your guidance. Teach me to go where you are leading. I am trusting in You. Amen.

Day 72 - Power of the Resurrection

It's Monday and I'm at my office desk drinking lukewarm coffee and typing my journal blog for the day.

Today's topic comes from Philippians 3: 10.


"I want to know Christ and the power of His resurrection..."

I'm reading a study guide on the power of the resurrection, and it compares Christ's physical resurrection in the New Testament to the deliverance of the captive Isrealites from Pharoah's control into the Promised Land. This Old Testament miracle is the raising of a dead nation, under the dominion of Pharoah.

In the New Testament, the miracle is the raising of Jesus Christ from the dead. Then, because of Jesus' resurrection from the dead...I can be raised from the dead, too! John 3:16: "For God so loved the world that He gave His only son...that whoever believes in Him will not die but have eternal life!"

Amazing miracle, for sure!

There was a song my mother used to sing when I was a little girl. The song went like this:

"Would you be free from your burden of sin?
There's power in the blood, power in the blood.
Would you o'er evil the victory win?
There's wonderful power in the blood!

Chorus:
There is Power! Power! Wonder-working Power!
In the blood...of the Lamb!
There is Power! Power! Wonder-working Power!
In the precious blood of the Lamb!

Would you be whiter, much whiter than snow?
There's Power in the blood, power in the blood.
Sin stains are lost in its life-giving flow.
There's wonderful power in the blood!

(Chorus.)

Would you do service for Jesus your King?
There's power in the blood, power in the blood.
Would you live daily His praises to sing?
There's wonderful power in the blood!

(Chorus.)

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Lord, teach me the power of your resurrection. I want to know You more. Amen.

Days 70 & 71 - You Can't See The Enemy

I finally realized that I fight a battle every single day of my life. I fight a battle to keep my house in order, to raise my children with morals and values and strong work ethics, to keep my marriage together, to maintain my sanity (hee hee), and other various battles throughout my day.

But the largest battle by far is a battle waged against the Evil One. I can't see him...I can't touch him...I can't hear him. He ever so stealthily sneaks upon me and my beloved family members...stealing our joy...stealing our unity as a family...stealing our hope for the future...stealing, little by little, our faith in Christ.

The Bible says in Ephesians 6:12: "For we do no wrestle (battle) against flesh and blood, but against the principalities (demons), against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places."

Everyday there is an unseen battle taking place in an unseen battlefield. My battle tactic and strategy should be this simple: Put on the armor or God! Be prepared!

Here's how:

"Stand therefore, having girded your loins with the truth, having put on the breastplate of righteousness, and having shod your feet with the preparation of the gospel of peace; above all, taking the shield of faith with which you will be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked one. And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God; praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, being watchful...." That's found in verses 14 through 18 of the same Chapter 6.

What, exactly, does that mean?

To gird your loins with the "truth" means that I have made a decision about Christ's truth of the gospel message...that He came to save me from my sins and that I will get to spend eternity in heaven with Him because of my act of faith. It also means that I believe the truth of all of the Bible...and that I believe in the "truth" of God and His trinity.

And what are my "loins"? Well, this is my lower back. In order to stand tall and firm, I must have a strong back. If my back is not strong, I will begin bending and bowing and falling. I must have something that strengthens my "loins." What is this? God's Holy Word. This is step one.

Step two: The breastplate of righteousness. Righteousness is a standard of truth...God's standard and not the worldly standard. Righteousness is not what I do for God...it's my surrender to Him and His truth. This makes me righteous in God's eyes. This breastplate protects my vital organs: my motives and my heart.

Step three: The term "shod" simply means strapping on my sandals. Roman soldiers wore thickly studded sandals with cleats on the bottom of them in order to stand firm on the battleground. My sandals can be compared to the Word of God, as well. If I stand firm on God's Word, then I am able to stand firm and the battlefield and not be moved.

Step four: This instrument of warfare is a defensive weapon in order to protect myself from harmful things coming my way. Remember the pictures in your mind of the first Gulf war...how the scud missiles were randomly launched onto the enemy in a barrage of death-seeking array? This is how Satan tries to take us down, as well. Or, Satan could be dousing a cloth-covered arrow with gasoline, lighting it, and shooting it my way. I have to use my shield to defend me. What is my shield? Again, it's the Word of God. Memorize it. Stand firm on its principles. Believe it to be true.

Step five and six: My helmet should be made of something very protective, such as the Roman soldiers wore. My helmet is also my salvation. It is what keeps my mind from following evil desires. It is what keeps my mind focused on heavenly and positive things. And my sword, which is small and easy to yield, will come in handy as I quickly use it to attack the enemy, to pierce his heart. Here's an interesting verse to go along with this study: "For the Word of God is living and active and sharper than any two-edged sword, and piercing as far as the division of soul and spirit, of both joints and marrow, and able to judge the thoughts and intentions of the heart." (Hebrews 4:12).

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Father, thank you for revealing to me the unseen battle that wages all around me on a daily basis. Help me learn to put on my FULL armor so that I may not be defeated by the Evil One and instead may fight the good fight and stand victorious in the end. Help me to learn your Word and memorize it and stand strong on It. Amen.

Day 69 - Closer than a "Sister"

I have two sisters. Although we are close and love each other dearly, we live very far away from one another. There are often great spans of time between phone calls and we are not always up-to-speed on each other's lives.

Thank the Lord I have a few friends who have become like sisters to me. These friends cheer me up when I am sad, rejoice with me when things are going well, and encourage me when times are tough.

Proverbs 18:24 says, "There is a friend who sticks closer than a brother." I will change that to read: "There is a friend who sticks closer than a SISTER."

Things have been especially difficult this past year and-a-half, so I am so very grateful to have these "sisters" to lean on.

I am most grateful, however, for their prayers.

"Oil and perfume rejoice the heart; so does the sweetness of a friend's counsel." Proverbs 27:6.

I love my friends! Thank you, Father, for blessing me with such wise counsel and such encouraging friendships. Amen.

Day 68 - I Wish It Was Friday

My toddler woke up this morning at 5:33 a.m., nearly one hour before she normally wakes. Once she was up, she couldn't go back down.

So we snuggled in her twin bed together in the darkness, pulling the soft, thick comforter up and over our shoulders and even over our chins. We laid there giggling as my toddler said silly things like, "My armpits stink," or "I have bugs in my pants!" She would caress my cheek, whispering "I wuv you, Mama." Then snuggle her head into my neck.

My husband was sawing logs in our full-sized four-poster bed, and our two older girls were sleeping off a late night of watching a comedy movie called, "National Lampoon's Vacation" with Chevy Chase. As I was drifting off to sleep, I could hear their giggles.

I was dressing for work when I realized, "Crud! It's only Thursday and NOT Friday!" I'd totally thought it was Friday and I was so ready for the upcoming weekend. :)

I bathed my toddler, gently washing her body and singing our bath song, "Wash-a-wash my baby gi-irl!" She sang along. She hates when I wash her hair, but this morning I let her drink her morning milk bottle in the bathtub, so she had that stuck in her mouth and didn't scream as I poured the warm water over her head.

My husband was awake now and sat in the bathroom watching our routine. He enjoys talking about things while I bathe in the tub or when I'm bathing the toddler. We have some really good conversations at these times. This conversation happened to be how proud he was of himself for learning how to run a front-end loader at work. My husband was raised with a silver spoon in his mouth (he comes from avery wealthy family), so his skills at running heavy equipment are pretty much nill. I was proud of him. What a very "manly" thing for him to learn. And he was so proud of himself, too.

Anyhow, I didn't have time to read my Bible this morning, but I thank the Lord for my family this day, for our warm home, for our refrigerator full of food, for our jobs and the health of my children. I pray this day that God would guide me and lead me...and that He would forgive my sins and draw me nearer to Him. Amen.

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EDIT: Okay, I'll fess up and admit that I'm scared about my job situation, that once hired, I'll be earning $600 less per month that I am currently earning...and I'll admit that I sometimes get nauseous thinking about "How will we pay our bills?"

And so I MUST trust God...knowing that all things work together for those who love the Lord. (Romans 8:28)

Day 67 - Unbelieving Spouse

I cannot begin to write how it grieves my heart and soul that my husband does not love the Lord.

He spoke a prayer 10 years ago...I did not hear it but he told me of it...that he would trust in Christ.

But that prayer has not been nurtured...it's like a seed that begins to grow in the cracks of a sidewalk. You see the first signs of life, two small green leaves beginning to grow towards the sky...but the hot sun scorches the new plant and it dies. There's no watering, no room for root growth.

I was thrilled when my husband told me of his prayer.

Ten years later, I believe he may have spoken it just to please me.

I am very sad not to have a husband who will hold my hand and pray fervently for me and our children. It grieves me that my husband cannot lift his voice to God and praise Him. It deeply wounds me that my husband does not teach our children about our Creator and Lord.

Today, I turned to the book of 1 Corinthians Chapter 7, verse 13.

"And a woman who has a husband who does not believe, if he is willing to live with her, let her not divorce him..." and in verse 16: "For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband?"

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Father,

Today I have a heavy and sad heart. I have prayed for nearly 17 years for my husband's salvation, or some tiny glimmer of hope that he will one day come to know you, that he will some day become the spiritual leader of our small brood of girls. Forgive me for my sadness and sense of deep loss...and help me to love my husband, despite his lack of love for you. Amen.

Day 66 - God Works Everything Into Goodness

"In ALL things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose." That's found in Romans 8:28.

This means that God NEVER takes away except to give us back something better. It means we must be brave enough and determined enough to wait...because it often takes God time to turn a painful situation to good. It means we can embrace our struggle and not resent it...because a blessing is coming!

That was my Verse for the Day in my Women's Daily Devotional Bible, written by Ann Kiemel Anderson.

"In ALL things, we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us." Romans 8:37.

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Praise God for His holy word! It encourages us, uplifts us, and helps us to hike up our britches, roll up our sleeves, and march forward...despite the obstacles we face.

My prayer today is that you will be reminded of God's word that He will turn your seemingly negative situation into a positive one! Amen.